Don’t hold your breath……

It’s been a while, hasn’t it? I know, I know. I’ve been neglecting my blogging duties. I try to publish at least one blog a month, and even though I posted one in March, there wasn’t really much to it.

I do have a few good reasons, though.

• I work all……..the,,,,,,,,time. Not really a joke. Since moving to night shift overtime opportunities are more and more available. And the extra money really comes in handy for a few purchases I’m thinking about.

 

These movies are terrible

• Pastimes. Along with all the work I do (did I mention it’s at night?), I also spend a lot of time going out with my friends.

1. Concerts: Company of Thieves, My Morning Jacket, Alice in Chains, The Swell Season, Neil Freaking Young!
2. Trips: Seth’s bachelor party, my upcoming one day Chicago adventure (blog to follow that one), and of course the annual Gulf Shores vacation.
3. Drinking……..That’s all to that one.

• Plus my desire to be entertaining. If you aren’t going to enjoy this blog, then why write one?

Hopefully with some of these events planned I’ll have a few good stories to post. Not to mention Seth and Kim’s wedding is this weekend. Which is crazy, it seems like only yesterday we first met Seth at McCloud’s. He’s all grown up now!

Too much to ask for a crazy wedding, guys? I need material!

 

Beam Me Up…….

So I need to decorate my place, right? Seven months and not a framed picture or anything. What would I really frame, though?

Also would make a good Christmas card

Plus I don’t think I’m qualified to be much of an interior designer. Here’s how someone with talent would decorate:

 

And this is how I would decorate:

The bathroom is even better

What can I say? I’m a nerd. I love all those movies with crazy effects and heroes and I’m a huge video game fan.

This isn’t exactly what I meant…..

This is just something that I’ve been thinking about recently.That universal question: What’s wrong with being a nerd? I mean, I’m a huge nerd. Always have been. I talk to people who love dramas and romance and things grounded in “reality”. People say they don’t like Sci-Fi or horror because it’s not very “adult”.

But tell me, which is more adult? Really? This…….

or………

 

Apparently in space, everyone can hear Bill Shatner scream.

Don’t “BE MINE”

I hate Valentine’s Day. Hate it. It’s a crappy holiday. Something invented to sell cards and flowers and candy. A night designed to prove your love for someone by the material gifts and decorations and little red hearts and cupids and what-not.

Now with more gay!!

First, you have all the people in relationships. This is when the pressure is on. Finding that perfect gift. That one thing that sums up the love (or like) that you feel for this person. Sometimes this is easy, I suppose. Flowers and a box of chocolates with a nice card.

And sometimes it’s really hard. Especially when you think you have the perfect gift. You’ve thought and you’ve planned and everything is perfect……until you see that little hint of disappointment in her eyes when she comments on your “interesting choice” of jewelry.

 

 

What’s the problem?

But it’s worse when you’re single. It’s basically one less holiday in the year. The gift that YOU receive on Valentine’s is the not-so-gentle reminder that you’re alone. Especially when you are recently out of a relationship. Those cards are the worst.

You don’t want to see the flowers. Trust me.

It’s also the worst night to hit the town, as a couple OR single. Making reservations is next to impossible. And don’t even bother just showing up. If you’re single, I’d also recommend skipping the movie theater, even if you’ve been waiting weeks for that one movie to come out.

 Oh, Channing………

So it’s a stupid holiday with stupid traditions that we all waste money and time on. Or it’s a stupid holiday designed to point out that you’re a social failure. Either way. I hate it…………….

……………….then again.

Maybe it’s me. Maybe I’m bitter and cheap and petty. Is Valentine’s day really that bad? I don’t really ever remember freaking out too much about a gift or a special dinner. Plus I remember a couple of times it was pretty nice. And I’m not depressed about being single, either. In fact, the idea of not buying a gift or going out is kind of appealing. Maybe I’m just a complainer. Maybe I want to not like something simply because so many other people DO like it.

So you know what? Forget what I said before. I like Valentine’s day. If the holiday is really about love and not gifts, then I’m okay. Because you see, my cat loves me. And right now, what more could I ask for?

No anchovies……..

Now that I’ve adjusted to working nights at the hospital, I’ve found that I know have the most ridiculous sleep schedule in history. Night and day have blended to the point where I’m not sure what time it is anymore.

Just an example: I got off work Thursday morning at 7am. Since I was going to be off for a few days I decided to try and get my sleep back to normal. For the most part it was okay. I’d stay up until about 2 or 3am, and the wake up the next morning around 10 or so.

Until Sunday. I ended up staying up the whole night. Not going to bed until around 9am Monday morning. I finally go to sleep……..and wake up at 9pm! Fantastic! I’m officially backwards now! Day sleep is the worst sleep possible.

On second thought…….

Switching gears, here’s a story that may make you think twice before ordering a pizza.

On said Sunday I was all about watching some NFL playoffs. Bret Favre leading the Vikings to the NFC championship game! How can you not love it?

I wanted to order some wings and a pizza and take them over to my brother’s place to watch the game. I won’t say where I ordered to avoid any lawsuits that may come from this nationally read blog.

Ignore that

I ordered online. 10 wings plus a sausage and mushroom thin crust. I’ve got about 15 minutes before I have to go pick it up when I get a phone call. It’s from the pizza place, telling me they are out of sausage. This is really upsetting. She asks me if I want to add ham or hamburger or change it to a specialty pizza. I’m at a loss. Italian sausage is the best topping on a pizza. I sigh and tell her to make it Supreme (of course it’s a supreme without sausage, so is it really supreme?). She tells me not to worry. She’ll “take care of me” and make it “look good”. I feel a little better.

I pick up the pizza and wings and head to Spencer’s apartment. I tell him the situation about there not being any sausage.

He doesn’t take it well

Luckily I remembered the parmesan cheese and crushed red pepper. 2 staples you must have. OK, so I eat the first wing. It’s terrible. Not enough buffalo sauce, plus it’s almost burnt. This is not turning out as I intended.

But the best part…..THE BEST PART…..is when I take my first bite of pizza. So let’s back up. When I showed up to buy this pizza, the manager opened the box to let me get a look at how she “took care” of it. Seemed fine. I take a bite and crunch down on something hard. Not rock-hard, but something my teeth couldn’t pierce. It was a little cardboard circle……on my pizza…..in place of sausage. When she said she’d make it “look good”, cardboard pizza wasn’t exactly what I had in mind.

Excuse me, but I said no olives.

I’ve never been a big pizza fan anyway, but this pretty much seals the deal. And the commercials say Domino’s tastes like cardboard. Go figure.

Hit the snooze…….

As I write this blog, I look out the window to the sun shining brightly in the sky. I think to myself: “What a beautiful morning!”. There’s just one thing: It’s mid-afternoon. That’s right! Welcome to the crazy world of working night-shift!

Sadly, I don’t get to work with Batman and the Fonz

At the hospital, night-shift is sometimes like a ghost town. You don’t really have as many patients or family walking the halls. The cafeteria is closed for the most part. Plus the occasional tumbleweed.

BUUUUT, the total workload is decreased, there’s better parking because no office staff is there, and everyone makes sure there’s plenty of coffee.

As long as we all know

I also have a really good schedule. I’ll save you the details, but it includes working no weekends. You know what that means:

No, wait. I mean:

Yeah, that’s what I mean……….really.

Anyway, so far so good for my first week on nights. Hopefully it’ll keep getting better.

Next up: My year-in-review. Stay tuned.

Try the Brie……

So last time I said that I was going to write a blog about throwing my first wine party. Apparently I thought there was a lot to tell. I was wrong…..

Actually, this was my first attempt at having a “classy” (as in adult) get-together. You know, soft candles lit with smooth jazz music playing. Complete with smoked almonds, assorted crackers (my friends. HA!), and of course, the cheese. Multiple varieties, including 6 years aged cheddar, brie, havarti, gruyere, and bruchetta jack. Arsenio would have loved it. 

This is some good-ass cheese!

Don’t believe me? http://good-ass-cheese.urbanup.com/2673065

Plus everyone showed up dressed appropriately. I couldn’t have been more pleased. But the best part of the evening was indeed the wine. Everyone I invited brought at least one bottle for everyone to try. We were upwards of almost 20 bottles.

Most of the night became a blur after a while, but I’m sure everyone had a good time. When I woke up the next morning (on the couch), I had 9 empty bottles on the bar. I know some people took what was left of theirs home. I still had some of the 4 bottles I bought as well.

All in all, a fantastic time and a great idea, if I do say so myself. Hoping to do it again in January.

Hold on tight, everyone. My next blog involves a big change in my job. I’m going to nights, and I want to tell you all about it……Stay tuned.

Invite me to your wedding……..

Before I get to topic I hope everyone had a great Halloween. Mine was a little quieter than usual, but I can always count on one thing being entertaining: Seth Johnson.

He’s the one on the left.

So this has been an interesting month. I have been to 3 weddings in 4 weeks. I thought people got married in the Spring. At least I can count on one couple doing that:

Wait till you see the cake.

I’m not really complaining, though. Most suits and dress clothes are warm so it’s just as well to go to a wedding in the fall.

Wedding #1: Dave Dickerson and Mary Ruth Covington

(Oct. 17th, 2009)

This wedding was held at Two Rivers Mansion in Nashville. Extremely cool. Very well done. Soft guitar music in the background, a poem, and a little ring bearer who was bored and decided to wander around up front. I really like outside weddings, anyway. Easy exit.

The reception was inside and Dave had made a compilation CD that played and he gave out copies to the guests. And at the end, we all stood outside and held sparklers…..much to my dismay (see Hold the lighter away), and the happy couple passed through the makeshift gauntlet to the waiting car.

All in all, I had a really good time. Especially since I wasn’t the one getting married. Plus I got to go to Dave and Buster’s!

Wedding #2: Brian DeFrance and Sandy Reynolds

(Oct. 24th, 2009)

This wedding took place in a small church that I no longer remember the name of. Much more of a religious-based ceremony. Complete with gospel bluegrass (which is cool) and cowboy hats. It also had one of the greatest wedding dinners ever: Taco Salad! I mean, how do you beat that? Here’s a picture of me at the wedding. Just cause.

What’s with this dude’s face behind me?

So all in all a totally different style, but still very enjoyable.

Wedding #3: Ryan Clayton and Magen Freeman

(Nov. 8th, 2009)

This wedding took place at the beautiful DelMonaco Winery in Baxter, TN. An outside wedding complete with vintage cars and live music.

For the reception we had swing dancing lessons and a full meal. Plus: you could sample the wine and even buy your own bottle to take back to the reception. I enjoyed this wedding because it gave me the chance to reconnect with friends that I haven’t seen in a while. Such as Heath, Kelly, Brandon, and of course, the groom.

We spent the afternoon enjoying wine and catching up with old friends. That evening we had a party at another friends house that was a little less formal. A lot of fun and a great way to end the wedding season.

All in all, I had a fantastic time at all of these weddings. I wish nothing but the best for the happy couples.

Next time: Listen as I reflect on throwing my first wine party! Until then……….